This is a story about some students of literature in a university. They were all very talented. There were would-be poets, novelists and essayists among them.
There were two groups among these students. Each group met separately to read and discuss each other’s writings. In one group, the members were merciless with each other. Even the slightest mistake was minutely dissected. They were heartless with each other. Criticism was bitter and no one was spared.
The second group too read out their works to each other. But there was a major difference. They were much softer with each other. Every attempt, however feeble, was encouraged. They gave positive feedback to each other. Sometimes, there was no criticism at all. Overall, the positive note was more pronounced than the negative one.
Twenty years later, a study was conducted by a student of the same batch on his classmates’ careers. He found a vast difference in the achievements of the two groups. In the first group, hardly anyone had any substantial literary achievement to his credit. But in the second group, there were six or seven people who had become writers of national eminence.
Talent between the two groups? Probably the same.
Level of education? Not much different.
But while the members of the first group spent their time pulling down each other, the members of the second group were determined to give each other a lift. The first group promoted an atmosphere of conflict and self doubt, as a result of which the quality of each individual’s work was not as good as it might have been. The second group, on the other hand, created a supportive and appreciative environment which brought out the best in their members. They worked better because they felt valued, and this made all the difference.
It would be a mistake to assume that people feel valued just because they continue to be productive.
If you want them to feel valued, you must do or say something to make them feel so.
Encouragement is oxygen to the soul. No one ever lived without it.
– Anonymous